5 Social Networking Lessons (even for introverts)

Perhaps it was a fortuitous coincidence that I met with Lynn today. Who knows really? Sometimes, in fact most of the time, our greatest gifts show up unexpectedly. That’s how I met the fisherman—pure chance. Some would say fate. Not sure. Don’t care. Just glad I met him.

Back to my meeting with Lynn. She reached out to me after reading a blog post. I checked her out first. I looked at her LinkedIn profile. I read her blog. I perused her company web site. She appeared legit. Thus, I accepted her request to meet.

We spent almost an hour this morning learning about each other. The conversation was easy and welcome. Our chat was filled with questions and exchange.

“Tell me about yourself.” “What are you working on?” “Can you give me some guidance on this…?” “What do you like to do for fun?”

Many of us (including me) would settle for living safely, keeping our network small, and then hoping for opportunity to come along in due course. The central function of networking is the creation and establishment of relationships. Without it nothing else—or at least nothing else worth having—is possible. If we open ourselves to the possibility of connection, the fluke of someone reaching out, we may just find, well… something unexpected. In Lynn’s case, I met a smart woman, a happy person, a successful entrepreneur, an innovator, a ball room dancer. All very cool.

This experience inspired me to share 5 social networking lessons (even for introverts):

1. Reach out  and be open to being reached. This one takes guts. Insert key, unlock ego and set aside. Ha! Seriously, it will be tough the first few times. I promise you—it will get easier.
2. Check ‘em out. Tools like LinkedIn and Twitter allow you to get a read on someone before you meet. These sites give you material to connect, to ask questions.
3. Be interesting. People need a reason to reach out to you or to consider your request to connect. I struggle with this one too—I always tell the fisherman, “I’m a simple girl. I don’t want diamonds. I just want another horse.” What I’m learning is that “be interesting” has little to do with what you know, but what you experience—how you see the world and your place in it. If your M.O. exudes negativity, anger, antagonism, then get on with your bad self and go work on that first.
4. Ask (or Accept) to connect. This is a hard one (especially for us sensitive folks). I try to remind myself that a “no” is just a no—don’t give that response any more power than it should have. When someone reaches out to you, be open and don’t be afraid to decline politely if it doesn’t feel right.
5. Listen. Whether you reached out or whether they reached out to you, spend most of your time listening. You already know what you think. This is your chance to be present.

We come across people that pause for us, that teach us, that guide us. Take a moment and say, thanks!

Thanks Lynn.

Tagged as: How To, LinkedIn, networking, Social Networking, Twitter